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the end of an era.

i am spending my twentieth birthday being admitted to a rehab facility. how the fuck did i get here? and how can i go back?
1. What did you do in 2009 that you’d never done before?
moved out of my parent's house for good.
'higher education' (college, hah)
shaved my head
completed a feature length screenplay

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
i don't make promises i can't keep. so, i don't make promises.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
my landlords girlfriend's sister? fuck, i keep people with baybays at an arm's length.

4. Did anyone close to you die?
no, thank you.

5. What countries did you visit?
america (new york), last february. and... that's it. how sad.

6. What would you like to have in 2010 that you lacked in 2009?
to be okay by myself. and i want to be OUTTA HERE. hah, how often do i say that.

7. What dates from 2009 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
my birthday april 27th, may 5th (something important ALWAYS happens to me on may 5th, it's a fact)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
my screenplay. hands down, always.

9. What was your biggest failure?
letting people and things get to me.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
weird tumor thing, fractured nose bone (twice!), countless bruises, weird mysterious allergy

11. What was the best thing you bought?
drugs.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
my mother. certain friends.

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
certain friends. myself, at times.

14. Where did most of your money go?
alcohol, groceries, drugs.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
moving out, finishing the whores on the hill.

16. What song will always remind you of 2009?
whatever you like anya marina version
i gotta feeling black eyed peas (shut the fuck up)
magic carpet ride
anything big d and the kids table
certain sublime

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:a) happier or sadder? b) thinner or fatter? c) richer or poorer?
a) happier, more self aware, which can lead to the opposite
b) 20 pounds thinner... gained 5 back (was 25 thinner) due to less cocaine dayum
c) much poorer, substitute full time job for college education

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?
working out, saving money, tattoos

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?
illegal shit that will bite me in the ass

20. How will you be spending christmas?
same old shit... church, seeing the lights in fairway hills, caroline's xmas eve open house, opening presents christmas morning, xmas dinner with family. i'll stop by oxanna's party afterwards then the next day off to toronto to meet up with old friends

21. Did you fall in love in 2009?
out and in and now i'm just smooth sailing.

22. How many one-night stands?
six. and two relationships. nothing to hide, baby. but you know, now i'm kind of avoiding all that and it feels... strange, but alright.

23. What was your favorite TV program?
law and order special victims unit. recently started getting into south park, king of the hill and the office too.

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?
nope. waste of time.

25. What was the best book you read?
haven't found any this year to replace my top favourites. smashed by koren zailckas i guess, even though i'm not ready to finish it yet. too much like me.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?
the pretty reckless.

27. What did you want and get?
love. friendship. a way out.

28. What did you want and not get?
a REAL way out. you never can.

29. What was your favorite film of this year?
up in the air.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
turned 19, predrank in my basement then went to arnold's sports bar with a bunch of friends. woke up in a random dude's bed with no memory of the night. how else are you supposed to spend your nineteenth, right?

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
learning to fend for myself.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2009?
19th century little boy slash pole dancer.

33. What kept you sane?
my friends. weetzie bat (my hamster). parents. WINE.

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
samantha ronson.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?
i am not so into politics. i'm not gonna pretend to be educated about issues i have no knowledge of.

36. Who did you miss?
i don't miss.

37. Who was the best new person you met?
mark. my roommates.

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2009.
you'll never really know. so don't pretend you fucking know. someone will see right through you. and it'll fucking KILL them.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.
"i don't like you and i'm not like you"
hola there my dears,

i haven't typed one of these in at least two years. this is my replacement for a 'friends only' entry, even though most of this journal with be locked to friends anyways.

quick recap;

i'm natalie catherine. all my old lj friends will remember me as slutatron, misselectrica, ___lonelydoll, plasticrown, or whatever. for all you guys, here is a ten second update on what i've been doing with the last two years of my life;

- switched high schools
-went a little crazy for a bit and dealt with your usual degrassi style drama (stuff i'm more likely to get into in you know, actual entries)
-bleached my hair, changed my life
-got a boyfriend, who i've been dating for two years despite drama (see above)
-graduated highschool. i'm eighteen. i don't know what the fuck i'm doing with my 'year off'. getting a job perhaps? i'm moving to toronto when it's feasible
-i'm currently in the process of writing two novels and adapting 'the whores on the hill' into a screenplay. please don't ask me how that's going at the moment.

anyways guys, give me an add if you still trust me to actually update and i'll add you back (probably already did).

for everyone else, leave me a comment if the life of an eighteen year old sometimes novelist always dramaqueen interests you in the slightest. i'll see what i can do :)

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